Tuesday, August 2, 2011


So I haven't written about our adoption plans for a while because...well...there hasn't been much to report.  In four months since we officially became prospective adoptive parents with the Cradle (you can read about the process here, here and here), we've been doing lots of reading on adoption and parenting, choosing an adoption attorney, researching pediatricians and asking friends who have kids for recommendations, and generally keeping a running list of things that we might need when we get called off the bench.  (Wow, I actually found a way to use a sports metaphor - go figure.) 

We had a very reassuring "check-in" phone call with our adoption counselor two weeks ago (something that we plan to do quarterly), and got an extra boost of courage and support.  And last week, we had our first six-month home visit, which is required in order to maintain our DCFS license that demonstrates we are capable of adopting an infant.  And we attended our first waiting family discussion group where we met up with our friends M and J, and got to meet some families that we've seen only through their online profiles.

We made a conscious decision when we started this process that we weren't going to keep any baby things in the house, except maybe a car seat (to bring our baby home on his/her first day), and some other sundries.  We just think it might be too hard to look at baby things every day while we were waiting.  And even though it could happen quickly (perhaps as quickly as 24 hours notice), we could easily dash over to Target to pick up everything we need in one shot.  But it's hard not to smile when we pass a baby clothing store and see all the cute onesies, especially those that say: "I love my two dads."

Personally speaking, I'm not anxious about the wait.  I know that for some waiting families, the wait itself can seem interminable.  But maybe it's because I'm confident that it will happen for us - that we will be the lucky adoptive parents of a child - that I'm not stressing out about it.  I'll be overwhelmingly happy to be a dad when it happens for us.  But in the meantime, we are going to keep living life, making our travel plans, having some work done in our house, enjoying the summer (hair-raising - quite literally - humidity aside), and remaining optimistic. 

Still, while we're tremendously happy to see that there has been a seeming uptick in placements in recent months, knowing that waiting parents have been matched, it's hard not to feel the teensiest twinge of why-not-us-itis.  For me to say otherwise would - quite honestly - be lying.

So here's where I need your help, please, gentle readers.   We've heard from the Cradle that a good percentage of matches between birthmothers/parents and adoptive parents are made through personal connections, so yours truly has finally set up that long-awaited Facebook page.  If you are on Facebook, please consider "liking" our page, and sharing it on your wall to help us spread the word about our plans to adopt. We'd be mighty appreciative of your help. You never know if your sibling's best friend's dentist's daughter's neighbor's BFF might be considering an adoption plan for her child and would be looking for a happy, stable couple in Chicago to be adoptive parents. 

Thanks for reading.